English class on a Friday morning, junior year:

"Choose a work of American literature and write an analysis essay."

No problem!

I need a book that’s a good read, good literature, and which I know pretty good, er, well. And with that, I choose "Slaughterhouse Five." Best of all, my English teacher can’t possibly know it, so I don’t have to worry about how well I write the assignment. This is the way to do a analysis essay!

The next day in class:

"Here's a list of writers to consider. Now who here has heard of Kurt Vonnegut?"

Oh, no...